“Absence makes the heart grow fonder”, “Distance is not a barrier when two hearts are truly in love”; These are statements that have been made concerning long distance relationships especially the ones that stretch between two countries or continents.
However, it is all easier said than done, as a long distance relationship is not very easy especially when it spans months before you and your lover are able to be together.
There are lots of obstacles and temptations when it comes to long distance relationships and I can tell you from experience, that there is a lot of work and commitment that goes into long distance relationships and it is not a child’s play.
Warnings
- Do not go into a long distance relationship if you are afraid of commitment
- Do not go into a long distance relationship just so you can have space to cheat or frolick with other people.
- Endeavor not to start what you cannot finish. I.e, Do not say “let me try out long distance to see if it would work or not”.
- Be absolutely sure that a long distance relationship is what you want to do with your life.
- You must realize that A long distance relationship is as authentic as any form of close range relationship or even live-in lovers.
- You must have a talk with your partner on the plans for the future and how long you both intend to stay apart.
- It is not Easy! You will definitely be tempted, sexually, emotionally, psychologically, socially and what not.
- You must learn patience and embrace it, for patience is one of the ruling forces of long distance relationships.
- Stay away from a long distance relationship if you have trust issues.
I wrote out the above warnings, so you can have them in mind before you venture into a relationship that requires you being away from your partner. True love knows no distance, but at the same time, not every one can define true love when distance is in the picture.
Myths About Long Distance Relationships.
There is a popular joke about being in love with a person far away from you, and the joke suggests that a long distance relationship can work if both partners can agree to have a side boo. That is a myth, because even married couples who live together still find a way to cheat. Infidelity is not a trade mark of long distance. A cheating partner is a cheating partner regardless of location or proximity.
Beliefs that state that people who are not close to each other cannot have a successful relationship are also false. Whether you are close to or far from your partner, anything can happen.
Most people think being far from your partner shows that the relationship is not serious. This is false. Work, health, family, career, are genuine factors why lovers may not always be together. It does not invalidate their love, the heart sees no distance.
Coping Mechanisms
- Communication—This cannot be overemphasized. We are in the 21st century and everyone has access to a phone. If you are able to read this, you have access to the internet. Communicate! Video calls are a great plus and a blessing.
- Reassure—This May be tiring especially if you have a needy partner. And if you are a needy partner, you and your partner need to constantly reassure and re affirm your love.
- Sex Chat— Do not be hypocritical! Sex chat, have over the phone sex, wank off/ masturbate together. Your bond would surely grow strong.
- Encourage—Constantly Encourage Each other and make promises.
- Stay Faithful—Allowing yourself to have a distraction would definitely jeopardize your relationship, if you cannot stay faithful, stay away from any relationship at all.
- Send Gifts—Thanks to courier services, You can send gifts and presents to each other. Works wonders too.
- Trust—All the afore mentioned would never work out well if there is no trust. Remember my warning above, do not start a relationship without trust, Talk more of long distance.
It is not easy, yes. But I must tell you, your relationship is valid. Distance is not a barrier. Plan to visit each other as often and as soon as you can, make the most of the moments you share together, have all the intimacy and savor them. Remember the sweetest moments are the waiting moments, yes they are. When you wait for something, the moment right before it happens is one of the best moments.
There would be fights and quarrels, which are perfectly normal. But do not go to bed Angry at each other.
#MBBALoveTips With @Ada_atm
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